I can’t explain what’s going on in my head lately, except to say that I’m craving a simpler life. I’m beginning to be really bothered by all the NOISE I have in my life. The TV is constantly on. During commercials I grab my iPhone to check out Facebook or Twitter or play a game. There’s too much STUFF in my house that I don’t really need. I wake up in the morning and turn on the TV to watch the news. I lay down to go to bed and turn on the TV to entertain myself before I go to sleep. We keep magazines in the bathroom because I apparently can’t take even 5 minutes without something to read!
I can’t remember what, if anything, happened to start opening my eyes to this. These are certainly not new to my life. I have been like this for a very long time. I was raised in a noisy house that always had music playing, at least one TV on and people talking all the time. Perhaps that’s where this all started – this need to have noise. I’ve been this way for quite a while. It’s only been recently though that I have started seeing how it affects me.
I do not take time to read scripture. My prayer life is in a coma. Quality time with my husband is often interrupted by an iPhone (mine and his). I rarely talk to my mother anymore now that she’s texting and on Facebook. It’s really starting to be a problem.
All of this has led me to make some big changes in my life. The first (and this one started before I really even noticed what was happening) is that I am having a huge yard sale. I have spent a lot of time the past couple months purging items I don’t really need or want. I’m still not done. I have picked through every inch of my house, and now I’m going to go through it with a fine toothed comb. I’m tired of holding on to all these things that don’t really have a place in my life – or SHOULDN’T have a place in my life. It’s just more noise in my house. So, shoes that I used to love, but hurt like hell, are out. That old comforter that we used to love, but haven’t used in 3 years? OUT! Supplies for those crafts I never got around to? Yup – OUT! It’s an amazing feeling to clear out my house – to give myself room to live. It will be really nice if I can sell this stuff and help pay off some debt!
The next change we are making is to take the television out of our bedroom. I want my bedroom to be a place where I can relax and rest. I have TVs in other rooms of the house. If I really want to watch something, I can go downstairs, or in the craft room or the guest room. When this thought first occurred to me, I immediately got a little anxious. I’ve had a TV in my bedroom since I was 16 or s0 – I couldn’t imagine life without it! But the past two nights we have left the TV off in the bedroom and have turned on some soothing music instead. We have fallen asleep to quiet music and quiet conversation, and it’s been WONDERFUL!
The other change I am going to make is probably going to be the hardest. I am going to take a Facebook break. I’m not going to sign off forever, but I am going to stay off of Facebook during Lent this year. It is my plan to come back after Easter, but only to get on it once or twice a day. Facebook has become really time and thought consuming lately. Don’t get me wrong – I really like Facebook. It’s a great way to keep in touch with friends and family, to share photos and events and things. But more and more lately I’ll be having a real conversation with someone, and they’ll say, “Didn’t you see what I said/posted/commented on Facebook?” I’m sorry – I have almost 700 friends on Facebook. I can’t possibly keep track of everything everyone says – even if you are my husband/parents/siblings/BFFs! Plus, I find that I’m filling my mind with stupid updates about people I don’t really care much about. Maybe that sounds mean, but I can’t be expected to care equally about all 700 of you. I want to give priority to my husband/parents/siblings/BFFs. All of this to say that Facebook is becoming too much for me. I’m going to sign off on Ash Wednesday and I’ll be back on Easter.
I can’t explain what it feels like for me right now. My life feels fuzzy – like there’s no real focus for me. My mind switches to and from so many things, that it’s beginning to sound like static. Some of these things are important – Matt, family, work, church – but a lot of these things aren’t important at all – TV, Facebook, text messages, STUFF. It’s time to de-clutter. Time to purge. Purge physical things from my house, mind and spirit. It’s time for me to focus on my health, my husband and my Lord.