>Not If…only WHEN

>I got an e-mail from an old SIFAT friend of mine this morning. We had lost touch for a couple years, but we’ve recently reconnected. Here is his e-mail:

“Not if, only WHEN.”

The exact words the Lord laid on my heart today when I was praying, words He told me to share with the ones I prayed for.

I know we haven’t had much chance to talk yet about a lot of things since we’ve reconnected, but you should know Karen and I have been praying diligently for you both in the matter of having a child, and today was one of those blessed Holy Spirit moments when God’s voice rings crystal clear. Just thought you might want to know. 🙂 Hang in there, both of you…the plan is always His.


Once again, God has my attention!

We didn’t really talk with Seth about our baby situation. He knows what you all know from reading this blog. He doesn’t know that over the past year, I had changed my language from “When we have kids…” to “If we have kids…” because of the hopelessness and doubt I have felt. I have been trying to be intentional about saying “When” lately, because we have received a lot of neat encouragement from God through other people. Dreams are being had, prayers are being said, and hopes are being realized again. I am so blown away that people would even pray for us, but even more so that God would speak to us through these friends of ours.

God’s words for us today are an encouraging command to TRUST that He has our family in His hands. It’s not up to us to know when this promise will come to fruition. It’s only up to us to trust God, place hope and faith in Him, and live in Him as we continue to dream. Our hope is being restored…

Thank you Lord for this awesome word today! It’s starting to sink in that we WILL have a family. We WILL be given the opportunity to raise up children in your name. Awesome!

>Bye Bye July…

>July is ALMOST over! It has been so crazy for us, and I can’t believe we’ve actually survived this madness. For those who missed it, here is a recap:

-My friend Lisa got married (wedding, bachelorette party, etc.)
-Awesome July 4th party with youth group and their parents
-Camping, Kings Island (amusement park) and Christian music festival for four days with youth group
-My friend Courtney got married, but I couldn’t go. Extreme guilt sets in.
Dad turned 57, so we got together to celebrate (read – eat A LOT)
-Family visited from Florida, so we got together to celebrate (read – eat A LOT…again)
Buster got a urinary tract infection that took us to the emergency room in the middle of the night.
-Buster got a urethral obstruction, has to be at vet (again) for two days.
We go to Texas with 14 teenagers for a week-long mission trip (post coming soon). Insanity begins.
-Our niece Tayla turns 12, but we are out of town. More guilt sets in.
-We return from Texas, fairly unscathed, but definitely pooped.
-We have our SIXTH wedding anniversary. We celebrate by getting Chinese take-out, and eating in front of the couch. I can feel your jealousy…
Mom has an emergency appendectomy. Long, boring stays at hospital commence. Work ceases.
-Old friends from SIFAT get in touch to let us know they’re coming through Indy, and can they stay at our house? Absolutely – insanity continues.
-Mom is released from the hospital, so I spend a day waiting for discharge papers, shopping for groceries and filling prescriptions.

You may notice that the above list does not contain any of the following:
-House cleaning
-Church Services
-Weekly youth events
-Daily hygiene

The house is NOT clean, I’m barely keeping up with laundry, sleeping is fitful, hygiene…what’s that? I have been brushing my teeth, but it’s always while I’m on the toilet and applying deoderant at the same time (I’m mastering this multi-tasking stuff). And church? Does. Not. Stop. EVER.

I have my class reunion this weekend, family visiting from Iowa, Tayla’s birthday celebration with us (called “Tayla Day” – we’re going for pedicures), and THEN I get my vacation…I think. We are currently planning on going to St. Louis next week for a Cardinal game, Tom Petty concert, sightseeing, SLEEPING, etc. We may end up missing out if Mom isn’t feeling well, but her doctor said this morning, “No way in hell would I let some appendectomy keep me from seeing Tom Petty.” Well said Dr. Browne.

SO – If I can just get through the next few days, I am set. The good news is that the next few days are full of fun things. I just wish the fun was more spread out.

When I do a post in September about how boring my life is, will you please slap me across the face with this dead fish I’m posting today to WAKE ME UP?

How scatter-brained was this post? Sorry about that…this is a glimpse into my brain right now! 🙂

>Rhapsody in Silver and Blue

>I am getting ready to have my 10 year high school reunion. Yes. TEN. YEARS. Ugh…

Some days it seems like it was just yesterday that I was a high school student. Oh my goodness, I was caught up in drama and boys and girlfriends and BAND…oh how I loved band…and school newspaper and ball games and boys and spring break and the fight song (“Home of the Silver and the Blue! P-M-H-S….THE BEST!”), prom and did I mention boys? I was ALWAYS with my friends, NEVER worried about much and OFTEN thought I was ready to grow up. I walked those blue halls with blue lockers, and dreamed of the day I would be older and carefree.

Other days that life I used to lead seems like it belonged to someone else. Like it’s the plot of a book I read and loved years ago. The older I get, the less it feels like ME. Because really, there’s no way I was a size twelve or a decent flute player or one of those mouthy girls who walks the mall giggling with her gaggle of girlfriends. That’s not who I was, right? I’ve always been overweight and responsible and tired and out of touch, haven’t I? Geez…

Did I mention that I’m planning my reunion? (Yes, I am a glutton for punishment. Why do you ask?) People keep asking me how I got the job of planning this shindig, and I’m honestly not quite sure. I thought I could help plan the event, since we finally lived in the area again. I got in touch with the Alumni Association at my high school, and was told that no one was working on the reunion. WHAT? No one is planning the reunion? We can’t NOT have a reunion! “I’ll get some people together,” I said, and here I am. I’m not the class president (who should be planning this thing). I wasn’t even one of the cool kids. I’m just some washed up band geek trying to get a party started.

I hope lots of people show up. We have a minimum food and beverage total we have to reach ($2000 – shouldn’t be hard with the cash bar, right?). I hope that I look good. I was too busy planning this thing to get in shape for it. (Okay fine, I haven’t been in shape for anything since I graduated…) I know people have Romy and Michelle delusions about what this reunion might look like, and I hope they’re not pissed when I disappoint them. Do you know how expensive reunions like that are? Maybe in another decade folks…

So in honor of my impending reunion, I wanted to share something with you. This is the poem my Mom and Dad (probably just Mom with Dad’s encouragement) wrote to place in the last issue of the school paper when I graduated. I loved it then, and I still love it today. I think it will be fairly easy to see that we love music in my family…

Princess Katie Diane

From House at Pooh Corner to
Opposites Attract
From Friends in Low Places to
A Boy Like That
From Rockin’ in the Free World to
Rhapsody in Blue
From Love Song for a Savior to

You’re our perfect Grievous Angel,
you’re our Devil in Disguise
You’re either Manic Monday or you’re
Almost Paradise
You’re such a Groovy Kind of Love, it’s true
Do You Want To Know a Secret?
We’re so proud of you!

Love, Mom & Dad